Thursday, July 30, 2009

Great Truths about life........?

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:



%26gt; 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.



%26gt; 2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.



%26gt; 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.



%26gt; 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.



%26gt; 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.



%26gt; 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.



%26gt; 7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.



%26gt; 8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.



%26gt; 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.



%26gt; 10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.



GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:



%26gt; 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.



%26gt; 2) Wrinkles don't hurt.



%26gt; 3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.



%26gt; 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.



%26gt; 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.



%26gt; 6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.



GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD



%26gt; 1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.



%26gt; 2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.



%26gt; 3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.



%26gt; 4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.



%26gt; 5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.



%26gt; 6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.



%26gt; 7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.



SUCCESS:



%26gt; At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.



%26gt; At age 12 success is . . . having friends.



%26gt; At age 17 success is . . having a drivers licence.



%26gt; At age 35 success is . . . having money.



%26gt; At age 50 success is . . . having money.



%26gt; At age 70 success is . .. having a drivers licence.



%26gt; At age 75 success is . . . having friends.



%26gt; At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.



Life is too short. Dance naked!!



Great Truths about life........?

I'm dancing with you! Woohoo!



Great Truths about life........?

brilliantly true have a star



Great Truths about life........?

yep...worth a star.



Great Truths about life........?

I heard the success part before but It was still funny! Have a star!



~Kim on Jazzys acc

No comments:

Post a Comment